A Change of Pace

I rediscovered a bit of old prose and thought sharing might make for a nice changeup. The sad tale is quasi biographical. Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Internal Injuries

Kyle wiped an angry tear from his eye. He was twenty years old now, an adult, and had kept a vow to defend himself since he turned fifteen. High school bullies broke his nose more than once but he always ended the fight victorious.

So how is this shit still happening? he wondered.

It’s not like he could fight back, though. His mother deserved better. It was bad enough she witnessed her husband’s violent tendencies. Kyle’s fingernails dented his palms whenever he considered what he would do if the bastard ever raised a hand to her.

The pair’s relationship improved when Kyle began computer programming for the family business. When he asked for a shift change or at least a pay raise for working the only hours he could regularly see his girlfriend, the fragile fraternal respect crumbled.

“You can’t keep a job without me,” Kyle Senior barked, shoving his son backward. “You’re a worthless dreamer.”

The sudden vicious attack slammed him into a wooden cabinet, its sharp corner impacting his left shoulder blade. Kyle turned away before his face contorted and he stalked out of the house, finding refuge in his car.

With a low fuel tank and little cash, he basically idled to a nearby park. There in the dark he turned off the engine and punched the steering wheel until his scarred knuckles felt bruised as his back.

His old man wasn’t entirely wrong. Kyle’s beloved begged him to stop searching for that ‘perfect’ job and stand up to any employer, his father included, who took advantage of his naïve enthusiasm. Perhaps then, she claimed, their combined resources might afford them a tiny apartment.

His current paltry salary made that hope impossible. Kyle snorted and shook his head, grimacing at the sharp pain it sparked. Sonya couldn’t know about this. His ego battered enough, her finding out he’d been a punching bag tonight was unthinkable.

Nor would he cancel their next night’s date no matter how much his family pressured him to work his one night off. Pained experience taught him he’d hurt worse by then but somehow he’d hide it, even if that meant avoiding intimacy. Sonya must accept exhaustion as the cause.

Once home he slipped downstairs to his room, avoiding his brother’s eyes as they passed. He sunk back into the saggy mattress and stared at the ceiling. It was going to be a long night.

~~~

Why is it that domestic abusers often target one offspring among siblings? Would you be interested in reading more (occasional) prose here?

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Surprise Gifts

Our friend Phoenix purchased a 3D printer this summer. I knew he intended to make something Halloween related for me. It was solid black until I played with some metallic paints and he seemed to like this clip I sent.

His second creation really took us by surprise. Phoenix said he’d found a single, solitary photograph including the three of us. It’s from our wedding. The fact my late mother-in-law and best friend are included makes it even more special. The gift includes a stand with a place to place a rechargeable tea light behind the negative.

I think our friend Kathy was admiring my pendant…

Have you ever used a 3D printer? Did you know photos can be replicated?

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An Upgrade

I liked my unicorn poop dishwasher magnet. But it fell apart numerous times during the process of being flipped. Attempting to crimp the cover to the magnet left it looking ugly and efforts to camouflage that made things worse.

At long last, tired of looking at the damage, I went Online and found a different style. The unicorn options weren’t as cute as what I’d had so I changed it up to a more practical design. There were several adorable options featuring various critters. This one fit our macabre sense of humor.

The knife is definitely dirty...
~evil grin~

Isn’t it funny that I purchased this on Black Cat Appreciation Day? Can you imagine what life would be like if felines had opposable thumbs?

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Odd Inheritances

My interests and tastes have always been quite different from other women I know. Male friends and colleagues notice this. Whenever a significant other wants something out of the house it often ends up with me.

One coworker’s son left behind his large Cartman, one of the “South Park” characters. Please ignore the fur on his face. Jezebel used to tuck up against him occasionally, hiding from kittens Terra and Polly. I never had the heart to remove the evidence.

I forget which spouse disliked Marvin the Martian...
How could anyone hate this grumpy little dude?

A buddy’s ex wife didn’t like his collection of H.P. Lovecraft plush toys. Shoggoth and Cthulhu were received with open arms.

Greetings from R’lyeh...

Shoggoth is upside down here;
I like the... mouth (?)...

That same dude’s former spouse kicked his poor wampa out the door. I have two cute versions purchased from Walt Disney World decades ago. The first got misplaced and we bought a second during another Orlando, FL trip. Personally, I think three wampas turn a house into a home.

Polly shows no fear of this harmless specimen...

Somehow my brothers and I played with this lawn toy without injury. Inside the box I found a useful surprise.

The tips are as hefty (dangerous) as they appear...

I don’t know why I never pulled those out of the box before the other day. The find’s timing was perfect as I needed some way to store various brimmed hats in a convenient way in which they wouldn’t receive damage.

The craftmanship is amazing...

 

This and another package had never even been opened!
I wish I had more of these beauties...

Can you imagine today’s parents buying something so dangerous to toss around the yard? Is it any surprise Jarts were linked to three tragic child deaths and over 6,000 emergency room visits?

Failure to Communicate

My husband’s lifelong communication quirks often amuse me. When we were young he mixed up two antiquated adages meaning all is well. Rather than say either ‘peachy keen’ or ‘hunky dory’, he replied, “Everything is peachy dory.” Sometimes I’m left baffled.

The other day he asked, “Can we get rid of that globe?”

I had no clue what he wanted me to throw away. It turned out to be my Halloween ‘snow globe’ whose bats flit around a haunted house. I wondered why on earth it should be tossed.

The one that he bought for me from Menards
is a few years old and a little different...

But he didn’t wish the thing thrown out. He just hoped I’d be willing to relocate it and free up an electrical outlet.

Is it any surprise this confusion occurs more frequently as we age? Doesn’t peachy dory sound like a refreshing summer cocktail?

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Christmas in August

This summer I met the lovely woman overseeing property renovations across the street. To encourage her mentally challenged nephew’s work ethic and build toward future autonomy, she set up a lawn mowing service in his name.

A few weeks ago another neighbor suggested they cut our grass to promote the fledgling business. I felt guilty not having more than $20 to pay the young man, especially seeing how hard his aunt worked alongside him, all the while pointing out any details he missed.

Fast forward to the present, my stubborn self finally took my husband’s advice and I called her. The pair arrived two days earlier than expected and brought the contractor and his employee along. I had no idea until I passed by the front windows and saw one of the guys edging the sidewalk, hacking away with a flat edged shovel (!) and heaping the huge amount of removed overgrowth for C and her nephew to bag up and haul away.

What a mess I had before...

I gratefully handed over $60, which still seemed too low, so I bagged up some of my garden harvest for both parties. The chief contractor said he would make salsa that night. That made me smile, and he beamed at me when I said it felt like Christmas. I know this transformation makes a lot of folks happy.

Can you believe the largess expressed by people who don’t even live nearby? Isn’t it cute that the young man chose a cartoon T-Rex as the logo for Dino Mowers?

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Bad Luck but Lucky Timing

My maternal grandparents always made my three older brothers and me feel welcome and cherished. One odd recollection is of a bush that bore delicious smelling flowers (?) with an almost leathery outer texture. Having been told it was called a spicebush back then I decided to try and find one.

Well, the thing I planted grew into an out of control tree with few blooms and zero scent. I kept defending its presence to my husband despite the fact it didn’t make me happy and looked, in all honestly, quite ugly. So I cut the entire thing down to a stump a few weeks ago.

Unfortunately, overexertion resulted in a small section of inflamed lung lining. Bending over caused the worst of that isolated little stabbing pain but I continue (!) feeling discomfort. On the bright side my husband just happened to purchase a long handled grabbing tool just days before my injury. Whew! I’m still using it today as day I type this.

My friend Scars welcomed me to what he
termed the Tool Using Monkey Club.

Meanwhile, our lawn grew taller and taller while I waited to heal. Our front yard is pitted with foot sized craters, so no way was I up to mowing. And I am equally averse to letting my husband risk his older self. But more on that for another post… Spoiler alert, this proved to be a blessing in disguise.

How lucky am I to have such an amusing friend? Have you ever suffered a pleural effusion?

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Overexcited, & Now Just Plain Excited

I’m thrilled that my dwarf, container grown corn is producing. But as the title bluntly hints, I harvested several too soon almost a week ago. I should have picked just one, not a regrettable seven. :( Refusing to throw them out, I cooked them. My husband, bless his heart, helped me eat that tiny harvest despite it tasting dry and almost woody.
 

The forming kernels were not plump at all...

Fortunately, today’s harvest of two proved sweet, if still tiny. They looked much more robust before being cooked.

The other was already being cooked before
 I remembered to take a photo...

Here are a few other useful lessons learned. Husking corn before cooking is a waste of time. Instead, cut off overhanging bits and microwave the entire thing for five minutes. the steaming process makes for a perfect chew and, better still, the cob slides right out of its husk. However, it’s best to refrigerate any you don’t plan to eat right away fully intact. This helps retain moisture.

Have you ever walked into a family friend’s cornfield and picked the sweetest you’ll ever taste? Can you believe my favorite memory from those farmyard visits is playing in the big barn with their youngest son and hearing my family complain how I smelled like pigs all the way home?

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