Thursday, October 19, 2017

Gotta Love My Dad - A Dirty Joke to Make You Smile

My father has a tendency to pass along amusing jokes. Today's is very dirty and absolutely hilarious.

Strippers and Dirty Old Ladies
 
Last night my Red Hat friends and I went to Ladies Night at a local strip club. One of the girls wanted to impress the rest of us, so she pulled out a $10 bill. When the male dancer came over to us, my friend licked the $10 bill and stuck it to his butt cheek!

Not to be outdone,
 another friend pulled out a $20 bill. She called the guy back, licked the $20 bill, and stuck it to his other butt cheek.

In her attempt to impress the rest of us my third friend pulled out a $50 bill, called the guy over, and licked the $50 bill. I'm worried about the way things are going, but fortunately, she just stuck it to one of his butt cheeks again.

Now
the guy turned to me! With everyone's attention focused on us the guy started egging me on to top the $50. My brain was churning as I reached for my wallet.

What could I do?

The dirty old woman in me took over!

I got out my ATM card, swiped it down the crack of his butt, grabbed the eighty bucks, and left.

~~~


What would you do in such a scenario? Hope you enjoyed a laugh and have a great day!

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Tuesday, October 17, 2017

American Satan - A Review



On Saturday my partner and I went to see “American Satan” in the theater and had a wonderful time. The movie isn’t for everyone but the acting is top notch. Malcolm McDowell never lets me down. Neither does Mark Boone Junior. His portray of the record company executive brought an irreplaceable, classy and entertaining element to the film.

Andy Biersack was stellar in his first movie role. Interestingly, his lip syncing of Remington Leith’s lyrics struck me as unrealistic. Perhaps it’s just because I’m such a Palaye Royale fan. That aside, now I’m loving Mr. Biersack’s Black Veil Brides (at home I watched BVB music videos, one after another, off YouTube).

Mr. Biersack Performing with Black Veil Brides
No offense to the ladies, who did a fantastic job, too, I can’t resist naming another standout male actor. No fan of the “Twilight” books or movies, I’m thrilled to have found the talented Booboo Stewart (Real first name Nils, he is too good to stick with that childhood nickname in my humble opinion). It doesn’t hurt that he’s gorgeous. He also strikes me as a good person based on his IMDB biography.

Now to the flick (sorry for meandering so), the plot advanced quickly, with no guesswork required to understand the implications. Due to the lack of intricacy I at first worried my partner might be bored. Fortunately, parallels to cartoon band Dethklok and plot/character elements from “Metalocalypse” brought endless joy to us both.

Humorous moments made us laugh out loud. Dialog came across clear, too, though by the same token I wish the music had been louder (I blame the theater, which I’d never visited before; perhaps they need a sound system upgrade). Dramatic elements were predictable but also well presented and treated with realistic arcs.

The female nudity got a little tedious. Heck, I said the same about “Blade Runner 2049”. At least here it was less gratuitous, though some racy scenes just went on a little long. We preferred interactions between the band members and the film’s understated devil.

Would I watch again? Yes, though not in the cinema. I want to buy the DVD and the soundtrack, too, in part to support everyone involved. The movie made for a fun Saturday afternoon.

According to an article, the creators have related projects in mind, some for the small screen. That will be worth investigating. Now that we’ve visited the cinema twice in one week I wonder what might draw us to go again. It might be a while based on all the CGI driven stuff previewed. “Annihilation” does look interesting, I’ll admit.

How often do you go to the cinema?

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Monday, October 16, 2017

Man's Best Friend



Once again I don't have a positive quote to share, but this Instagram image of Nikki Sixx celebrating his dog’s birthday. I couldn't resist these sweet, adoring faces. So, Happy Belated Birthday Leica Sixx.

Puppy Love
Happy Positive Sparks Monday! Thank you Annie, for starting this movement to uplift spirits in these often dark times.



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Saturday, October 14, 2017

Dinner and a Movie

My partner and I are big fans of the Faustian mythos. Now in theaters, “American Satan” is a Faustian tale with a modern rock and roll twist. And it stars Malcolm McDowell. That sounds like a win/win. It also doesn’t hurt that, as I mentioned before, music by Palaye Royale features in the film.

Rock and Roll is Where God and the Devil Shake Hands
Planning at first on going Monday afternoon, we decided against waiting. Now we’re planning on going today and I can hardly wait. As an added bonus, I suggested dinner somewhere in the cinema’s vicinity as it’s outside our normal stomping grounds. My partner is a fanatic over the culinary arts.

So now it looks like we’ll be enjoying Nepalese cuisine after the film. Should be fun. I’m sure there will be a movie review soon to follow. In the meantime I’m editing a story on the back patio, enjoying our beautiful temperatures and blue skies. I can’t ask for a better Saturday.

What’s your weather like today? Anything special going on inside or out?

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Tuesday, October 10, 2017

“Blade Runner 2049” – A Review



I know there are plenty of reviews of the latest “Blade Runner” movie out there but I couldn’t resist, in part because current flicks so seldom interest me. My partner and I are more likely to stay at home than go out to see what seem like CGI-fests and tedious remakes so often put out by Hollywood these days.

So, here we are. Let me start by saying I am a total geek fan-girl over 1982's “Blade Runner”, though we never watch anything other than the original theatrical release (which I was too young to see in theater, I might add ~grin~). This sequel did not disappoint, with a style very true to the original. Both the expected and surprise cameo appearances well represented their classic roles, too, a real treat.

Every set was amazing, and drew me in as realistic no matter how surreal. The acting left nothing to be desired, nor did the characters themselves. I also understood the dialog well outside of one brief exchange. And that’s praise worthy since volume levels, whether background music or sound effects, sometimes overwhelm speech (especially for my partner, who is deaf in one ear).

The film is quite long, and my biggest complaint is that some scenes could have been shorter without harming the content. Our time in the theater went fast, considering, and we are still talking about the experience today.

It's too bad several older men in the audience couldn’t sit through the viewing without multiple trips to the restroom. ~shakes head~ Forgive me, but it was sort of interesting in an odd way. I planned ahead by sipping my soda.

On another note, I am no prude but the female nudity got a little tedious when even the occasional futuristic advertisement omitted clothes. That might have been more forgivable if not so one sided.

In short, we are glad we went. And if you like dystopian science fiction, I recommend spending the time and money.

Now I’m looking forward to next week’s release of “American Satan”. It’s a Faustian tale featuring rock and roll. Gotta love that, especially when Palaye Royale's lead singer Remington Leith provides the musical vocals for the main character.

Remington Leith (left) and Emerson Barrett of Palaye Royale
I Couldn't Resist Promoting These Rockers Again...
It should be fun, though I know Andy Black (of Black Veil Brides fame) fans are disappointed his voice wasn't featured. It's a technique creators reportedly used to further remove the audience from the real world.

What movie would you consider a must see?

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Monday, October 9, 2017

My Silly Tilly



Other than to give music credit to Imagine Dragons (my partner just happened to be listening to the song “Believer” in the next room), I’ll let this video speak for itself.

video




Thank you to Annie of McGuffy’sReader for the Monday feature to spark positivity! I figured this video fit the theme. ~grin~ Happy Monday all!




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Saturday, October 7, 2017

What is the World Coming To?



For several years I have been gluing together my clean/dirty magnetic sign for the dishwasher every time it falls apart. I don’t know why the original glue failed but have foolishly continued using the temporary solution of hot glue.

My partner tired of this roughly biennial ritual and suggested buying a new sign. “Fine,” I said, “You’re in charge. Get whatever you want.”

And now we have this:

I Don't Know What to Say
I have to laugh even while wondering where this crazy world is headed.

Do you think it’s cute or too silly for words? I guess either way it’s all good. At least we’ll know whether or not the dishwasher needs emptied.

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Friday, October 6, 2017

Rocking Fashion



After the mildly crummy day I had, seeing my latest favorite vocalist rocking a dress at LA Fashion Week gave me a much appreciated smile. Thanks, Remington Leith, for bringing fun glamour back to rock alongside your talented brothers. Palaye Royale rules.

He Wears it Well, and Sings Crazy Good
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Thursday, October 5, 2017

Rainy Day Delirium



It’s been a crappy week. I don’t know anyone who would refute that. Between the horrific shootings in Las Vegas and the untimely demise of artist Tom Petty, October has not gotten off to an auspicious start.

Today we are at least getting some much needed rain. Unfortunately for me, I needed to leave fairly early for a dental appointment rather than getting to enjoy the weather on my covered back porch. I left at 9:30, giving myself a little extra time in case of traffic.

And good thing, too. Only upon making one of the last turns toward my destination did I recall that my dentist moved his practice. I drove the rest of the way to confirm my faulty memory and get the new address off a note posted on the door.

Taking off, I was glad to see my arrival would only be about three minutes late according to the Volt’s guidance system. That is until I encountered a detour. With one turn my tardiness approached the ten minute mark. Sitting at a long traffic light I took the opportunity to call and warn the office.

Another good thing. It saved me being embarrassed in front of strangers.

My ten o’clock, October fifth appointment was in 2016. The receptionist didn’t find me having any 2017 fall teeth cleaning scheduled on their roster. That’s baffling. Normally I don’t leave the dental office without scheduling the next bi-yearly appointment.

I drove the rest of the way so at least now I know where I’m going when I leave for my newly scheduled visit next week.

All in all I wasted over an hour driving around in the pouring rain. Another positive is that the downpour continued after I reached the park near my home. Having taken my laptop along this morning for the purpose, I enjoyed some pleasant writing time beneath a shelter. That’s where I typed this, in fact.

Now I’ll go home where Internet connectivity will allow me to post. I’d stay longer to work on my latest story without social media interruption or even just to watch ducks swimming on the nearby picturesque pond. But this wooden picnic bench is feeling mighty hard.

How is your day going?

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